How to Make Your Significant Other Appreciate You More

Face it…We all want to feel appreciated. Even if you refuse to admit it, you do. It is human nature. And when you feel not heard or even overlooked by your partner, it stings.

But remember, no one is a mind reader. And if your significant other is not giving you the feedback you need, you need to step up to the plate and say something. But how?

Tell your Partner Exactly How You Feel

Dr. Mark Travers says to simply show more affection. A simple hug or hand squeeze, a gesture to show that you care. That way, he/she will reciprocate, and if they don’t, say something, like, “I love it when you hug me. I feel loved. I really need that validation.”

If you state your needs simply and emphatically, it tends to stick, and they remember.

Also don’t forget to remind your significant other that you are a shoulder to lean on…That you are there for them, and you really need them to be in your corner as well.

After all, the two of you are a united front against the world. Or, so thought this 22 year old woman on Reddit. She feels completely ignored by her 37 year old husband. She is a stay-at-home mom and believes that he treats her badly because she has no choice but to stay.

Almost every commenter suggested OP leave him. One person wrote:

“Why stay with someone who treats you like this when you can be with someone who treats you like a queen? There are plenty of men out there who will love and cherish you the way you deserve. Who will tell you how beautiful you are every day.”

Or, perhaps give him an ultimatum. He then might realize how serious the situation is. The OP’s husband could do a complete 180, if he realizes his marriage is on the brink.

But, if he doesn’t change, she has no choice but to kick him to the curb. Once you give an ultimatum, you have to be ready to back it up.

My friend was a stay-at-home mom, and her husband had an affair with his secretary. She was understandably devastated. He ended up leaving her for the other woman, so divorce was the only option.

Although, I am not sure she would have left him, even though he cheated. To my friend, the new wife stole her life, because she loved being a stay-at-home mom.

I believe if he hadn’t left, she would have been miserable in the marriage, realizing she could never fully trust him.

I lost touch with my friend, but I do know she went back to work as a teacher and to my knowledge, never remarried.

Yes, divorce is traumatic, but you have to ask yourself: Is remaining in a bad marriage simply so you can stay at home, worth lowering your pride and your self esteem every single day?

Should You Try to Fix an Unhappy Union?

Dr. Mark Banschick says happily ever after is a fairy tale. But some marriages are repairable.

He maintains, ”When people grow apart, there is no clear-cut path to follow that will lead to the right outcome.”

Sometimes therapy works and sometimes it doesn’t. But one thing is certain. You should never feel diminished or unheard. Demand to be treated with dignity and respect…to never be overlooked.

Dr. Banschick said it best, “The decision to divorce should be made with a sober mindset, understanding that it will be a difficult process.”

If your spouse understands how upset you are about the way you are treated in the marriage, maybe he/she would be willing to give therapy a try. That at least, is progress.