advice
Dating, married, single, divorced, and more. Advice on the relationships you have in life. Dear, Humans..
Casanova vs. Don Juan: Do You Actually Know the Difference?
After an early morning power walk through the old neighborhood in Mexico City where I live, my exercise partner and I sat down to a cup of coffee in Joselo, a small cozy coffee shop across from Parque Lincoln. Mornings in the Polanco neighborhood, before cars begin to crowd the narrow streets, when it's only locals, their dogs, and elderly men reading paper and drinking strong coffee, is by far the most peaceful time of day. On one hand, Polanco feels very much like a village; easily walkable, charming old buildings, outdoor markets, and unassuming dog friendly cafes; on the other hand, there is a large concentration of trendy hotspots, drawing crowds from the suburbs nights and weekends, a bevy of high end luxury stores, and new, modern construction going up everywhere. The contrast of old and new, however, gives it a special flavor that not many areas can boast.
By Leslie Sharp8 years ago in Humans
Love Hurts
When we talk about domestic abuse, we miss one of the most important factors—love. We frame the argument in more rational terms, e.g. when we believe the victim only stays for practical reasons. We feel it must be because of lack of resources, or isolation, or logistics. At worst, they might remain through fear, compliance, or learned helplessness. But that’s only part of the problem. All of these reasons are valid ones, but by concentrating only on the practical, we’re only seeing part of the picture, and we’re letting survivors down.
By Katy Preen8 years ago in Humans
Advice I Wish I Had
The other day I was scrolling through Facebook just passing time. I came across a post from a girl that I don't really know and never have really talked to. She was saying how she was upset and felt worthless. Even though I've never talked to her before, I wanted to message her and make sure she was OK. When she finally responded, she said that her boyfriend had recently broken up with her. Now, we have all been through a breakup before. This was the one that hurt. She told me how she felt worthless and that she was never going to find anyone and why go on with life. I gave her advice. At first, it was the advice I've always been given; the "oh, you're not going to be alone forever" advice—then I realised it's all fake. I told her my advice, the advice I wish I would've been given. I told her I understood what she was going through. I know that kind of relationship because I had it. It was that relationship where you love him so much that it hurts, but it hurts even more when you can't love him anymore. I told her how I cried myself to sleep for months, how I thought it was all pointless, how living life without him would be pointless.
By Alyssa Smith8 years ago in Humans
A College Girl's Guide to Friends With Benefits
In this day and age, having a friend (or friends) with benefits is more common than not. Older generations may frown upon casual sex, but there is nothing wrong with having someone to relieve stress or just have fun with. This can actually be healthy. Just like hugs and/or drugs, sex can increase the dopamine levels in your brain. Especially if you're doing the dirty deed with someone who knows how to make your toes curl.
By Samantha White8 years ago in Humans
Signs of Cheating
Cheaters are not cheaters by the sheer presence of temptation, but by the willingness to act upon it. Instead of taking accountability for their flaws and shortcomings, they choose to take the option of, "Well, this grass is greener" instead of watering their own, so to speak. They don't want to have their eyes opened to the fact of what their faults are and often times they pass the blame onto their partner. They start withdrawing from their partner sexually, emotionally and physically. We know these signs all too well for those of us who have been cheated on. They start being less and less intimate with time. The cuddles become more absent and your want and/or need for affection feels like it takes a toll on them and it pains them to show you intimacy in any way. They no longer come to you with their emotional problems and struggles. You are no longer the one they confide in; instead they have a new source for comfort. They opened the door to your relationship and let someone else in. Physically they no longer have a want or desire to do activities that they used to do, whether that be go for a hike, or to see a movie maybe even out to dinner. It's almost like they no longer want to be seen in public with you. Maybe that's the guilt they feel, if any, or they'd rather be out in public with the person that's really on their mind, which isn't you. Cheaters most of the time are always going to be cheaters. Cheating also doesn't have to be the physical act of having sex or sexual relations with someone else. It's cheating once you start a relationship with someone that isn't your significant other. They tell your problems to this other person and it's not to get advice on how to better your relationship. They allowed someone else into your relationship only to tempt them with the idea of something better because you're going through a rough patch. Instead of working on the problems in your relationship, they in fact make them worse. A cheater will more likely than not lash out at you and make you the root of all the problems in your relationship. The reality is, they're manipulative and their feelings were never genuine. They try to make you believe that you're the problem and they become increasingly irritable and on edge. Every little thing bothers them and they look for excuses to start arguments with you, blind to their own attitude flaws, or it may just be denial. They can do no wrong in their own eyes and are never the ones at fault. If you've ever been the victim to a cheater you know the warning signs and your gut is probably telling you what's what, so follow it. The signs are usually always the same and if they're willing to cheat once, the likelihood is they'll do it again. The first time cheating on someone is the hardest; anything after that is a cakewalk. This is not to say that all cheaters are the same and that they are incapable of changing, or that they're going to cheat on everyone they're with. Honestly, if someone cheats they're probably not the right person for you, but there is still hope in some cases that it can be rectified for the better. It all comes down to what path you choose to take when faced with a cheater and how to spot the signs to protect yourself in the future.
By Alexis Amill8 years ago in Humans
