Satire
Do My Bidding, Mosquito Army!
I LOVE My Forest. The emerald sky where I live is pierced with shades of blue beyond. Birds sing their lewd songs to each other during the spring and scream at their children during the summer creating a cacophony of sounds that we humans describe as beautiful. Fireflies light up our summer and autumn nights with flickering and fluttering eloquence, and an opossum has been adopted as a nocturnal snuggle/dinner buddy by the colony of rescue cats that I hold responsibility over and has even on occasion let me run my fingers gently over its back side (before saying: "Okay. That's enough, friend" by politely walking away). And the cicadas sing us to sleep every night. It's peaceful, it's quiet, no noisy human interference, and you can see the stars for miles. And come morning, (especially in the cooler months when the morning fog lifts off the ground in opalescent swirls of cloud low to the ground) we are greeted by little families of deer.
By Hope Martin2 years ago in Humor
TURNING 70. Top Story - August 2024.
Should I wake up breathing on August 24th, people who have known me since my youth will say that I beat the odds. No one-- and I do mean no one-- believed I would survive my 20s. My Mother used to say, whenever I called from a payphone in the middle of nowhere, "You're going to end up dead in a ditch!"
By Tina D'Angelo2 years ago in Humor
What I've Learned from Living in Montréal...
It must be said that certain towns have a charm of their own, one that you do not appreciate until you leave and see what the wider world provides. I have lived in Montréal since the early 2000s (had visited in 1999 after attending a wedding), and I see no reason to return to my hometown (Hamilton), its loud neighbour (Toronto), or any other region I cannot afford or access without the benefit of an automobile.
By Kendall Defoe 2 years ago in Humor
Donald Trump Calls for November Presidential Election to Be Cancelled
Disclaimer & Release of Liability: Reader discretion is advised. May cause involuntary eye-rolling (whatever you’re looking for might be back there), fits of giggles, a raised eyebrow, a chuckle, or an involuntary desire to consult a higher power. Proceed with a sense of humor and wonder. You have been warned. Author not responsible for liability or lost or damaged items or sanity.
By Sir Thomas Goodwin2 years ago in Humor
The Hidden Truth
In the quaint town of Everwood, secrets were a rare commodity. Neighbors knew each other's business, and life was an open book. But, nestled at the end of Maple Street, there was one house where a mystery lingered. It was the home of Mrs. Eleanor Hartman, a reclusive widow known for her sharp mind and even sharper tongue.
By Kingsley Egeke2 years ago in Humor
The Joaquin Dead. Content Warning.
Folks, if you're hunkered down for the night in some abandoned house, hiding behind a make-shift barricade, curled around a small transistor radio with the volume turned down low to save batteries and so the zombies won't hear and come crashing in to devour your flesh, if over the past few months you've seen loved ones massacred by hungry monsters, some of them still alive and driven to madness by our now lawless society, well, I can finally tell you who's to blame for all of it. It's Joaquin Phoenix. Yes, the movie star, the man who used to delight you in such films as Gladiator and Walk the Line (and well after I originally wrote this, The Joker). Joaquin Rafael Phoenix, of Puerto Rico, brother of the late River, and I'm sad to report, also now late Rain, Summer, Liberty, and half-sister Jodean, all of whom were consumed at the Phoenix compound, in, ironically, Mesa Arizona. Joaquin Phoenix, nominated several times but never winning Academy Awards, Golden Globes, and BAFTAS, whatever those are. Joaquin Phoenix, once called Leaf, is whole responsibly for the zombie apocalypse.
By Jason Edwards2 years ago in Humor
11 Ways to Overcome Writer's Block
Writer's block-- it happens to everyone. Well, not me, you know, I've never, personally, had a problem like that. I mean, sometimes if I have too much whiskey the words will come out a little bit soft, but you know, they're still words, so that counts. Right? But enough about me. I'm here for YOU right now. You're the one with the problem, and I'm going to fix it for you, because that's what friends are for. So here are eleven ways to overcome writer's block-- and none of them were created by Chat GPT!
By Jason Edwards2 years ago in Humor
And Then I Woke Up
I’m typing furiously on my technicolor keyboard. I’ve been arguing with a netizen over what animal Uniqua from The Backyardigans is for so long that I’ve lost track of time. Right now, my theory is that she’s a ladybug, but I can’t be certain. After all, it’s the end of the world, and anything can change.
By Wen Xiaosheng2 years ago in Humor
