Latest Stories

Most recently published stories in Psyche.

Making the Climb
All my life I have struggled with this sensation in my chest, well sort of in my chest. It was really centered right above my stomach and right below my sternum. For my whole life I walked around with this little black ball inside of me, I could feel it there, right underneath the surface of my skin. It always made me feel out of place somehow.
By Brittany Dolliver8 years ago in Psyche
Learning to Breathe
"Just breathe, Baby." I try to focus on those three words. Just three words which sound farther to me than the atmosphere. Still, for the moment I am desperately trying to cling to them. To find solace in those words.
By B.C8 years ago in Psyche
Hiding Behind a Smile
Holding onto hope. Depression does not define you. For too long I lived my life hating who I was. It was a constant battle inside my head between who I wanted to be versus what depression would permit me to become. I allowed it to define me because of my lack of self- worth and because at the time, people had labeled me as who they saw. I was the “freak,” “miserable,” “pathetic” and “self- absorbed.” Instead of trying to understand my problem, I became the problem. Therapy and medications defined me as damaged. People withdrew from my company. I became isolated to the point that suicide seemed ideal. After all, who could possibly miss me when I was gone?
By Jess8 years ago in Psyche
This I Believe...
I believe anyone can overcome the death of a significant other. That having to cope with the loss of someone you love so dearly can only make you stronger.
By Alyssa Shifflett8 years ago in Psyche
The Total 100% Truth of When (and why) I Tried to Kill Myself
Picture it. Summer, 2014. It was the summer before my senior year in college. I got a job at my university living in a dorm helping out with summer camps. I lived totally on my own for the first time ever, my own private room and free time out the wazoo. And this was the year that the app Tinder was used by everyone. Obviously that included me.
By Sawyer Garrett8 years ago in Psyche
My Room Doesn't Have More Elephants than Yours
An elephant trying to cross a tightrope on a unicycle. Not sure if it was safe, no certainty whatsoever if he could, should, would make it to the other side. The elephant knew, though, once on the tightrope, there was no turning back. He convinced himself it was worth it but his legs did not seem to respond. He did not understand it. They were working a minute before.
By Fernanda Grether Zdanowsky8 years ago in Psyche
Depression
#DEPRESSION Depression is not the same as sadness, it isn't self-pity or self loathing, it's something far more internal and is usually triggered by emotions that have nothing to do with money, cars, or beautiful partners. In fact many rich, successful people with wondrously beautiful spouses suffer depression and some have even commit suicide because of it, and the worst thing is the outer world saw these people as having perfect lives simply because they owned a lot of material items and had a plush bank account so nobody even cared to notice what was going on internally. This is the problem that we have regarding depression, people think it is about outer self, that it is about not having material items or comparing to others, those are all outer things and you may want and you may very well need these items in your life but they are not enough to trigger depression if you don't have them, because there is no emotion attached to fast cars, money and luxury goods.
By Cordayne Wander8 years ago in Psyche
PTSD
"PTSD, are you sure?" I nod with uncertainty, at the woman across from me, although I had a formal diagnosis under my wing.
By Alison Atkinson8 years ago in Psyche
Xanax
A few years ago I was diagnosed with a few mental health conditions, generalized anxiety disorder (GAD) proving to be one of the more invasive ones in my daily life. I still experience extreme anxiety making plans with friends I've known for ages, throughout the day I experience moments where it feels like my heart is going to beat right out of my chest, and I tend to think of the worst when something doesn't play out exactly as how I thought it would.
By Katharine Danae8 years ago in Psyche
A Philosophical Approach to Conquering the Fear of Meaninglessness
The possibility that I'm building a life for myself that is meaningless is one of my biggest fears. The dull repetition of days (which seems to be one of life's inherent qualities), haunts me with the idea that a meaningful life is impossible to attain. The idea that life can be devoid of purpose plagues me. From spending many tedious days considering this, I have acquired a deeply embedded fear that my life is useless, meaningless. Days as such take me away from myself, forcing me to look at my life as though I was watching an hourglass, staring as sand tumbles down until my time is out. When I’m breathing my last few breaths someday, watching the last grains of sand fall, I fear I'll look back on monotonous days and despise myself for never turning my life into something meaningful. So, while empty hours drift by, I find myself trapped in a reflection of why I do the things I do. I wonder how I should be living differently to gain more out of my life. I wonder if anyone else feels this way so often. Finally, I wearily wonder if anything is even worth it, and if there is even a point to trying.
By Cecilia Bilton8 years ago in Psyche
Mental Illness: The Demons Within
One of the illnesses I was recently diagnosed with while I was hospitalized is BPD, aka Borderline Personality Disorder. The definition of the disorder according to The National Institute of Mental Health website is:
By Alyssa Lactin8 years ago in Psyche
Questionably Stable
In the beginning, there were only two. One a girl and the other a child that continued to change gender. While they both looked very similar, the girl seemed to be more mature than she really ought to be. The other was exceedingly violent and had a dark sense of humor. The two often worked together so that none of the adults in their household realized that they both inhabited the body they shared.
By Jay Hogue8 years ago in Psyche